Wednesday, September 30, 2015

The Best Birthday I Ever Had...

And the winner is..................
All of them.
Is that cheating?
It never fails.  It seems like every year I'm asked the question, "which one of your birthdays was the best the one?".  Honestly, I can't really answer that question with absolute certainty.  There are many birthdays that I don't even remember.  There are others that I do recollect.
I remember my 10th birthday.  I had 4 buddies spend the night.  We ate pizza, stayed up late, played Excitebike on my Nintendo, battled the gridiron on my new electronic football game, and took turns passing gas in the face of the first one of my buddies to fall asleep.
I remember my 12th birthday.  My parents rented out a room at Aladdin's Castle.  It was the popular video arcade at the mall in Owensboro, Kentucky.  Each one of my guests got 10 free tokens.  I got like 50 free tokens.  My wrist was tired from weilding the heck out of the Mortal Kombat joystick.
I remember my 16th birthday.  My parents tried to surprise me.  It sorta worked.  Honestly, I just remember turning 16 more than anything!  I was the youngest kid in my grade.  I finally felt caught up to everyone else.
I remember my 21st birthday.  My girlfriend....(now wife) tried to pull off a surprise party.  Unfortunately, one of my buddies who was notorious for not keeping his mouth shut, ruined that one.  The party was still a lot of fun, despite me finding out about it beforehand!
I remember my 22nd birthday.  It was the first birthday in which I felt like an adult.  Just minutes before I celebrated with Stephanie and my parents, I was cleaning hair out of the shower drains in the men's locker room at the Clarksville Athletic Club.  Glamorous.
I remember my 30th!  Stephanie again tried to surprise me.  This time, it actually worked.  It worked because she scheduled the party 2 weeks before my actual birth date.  I didn't see it coming so early.  I remember a friend from church was sent to be a distraction.  He made up a story about believing in aliens and said he needed my counsel.  I remember trying to rack my brain to come up with the best theological advice that I could.  I was glad to find out he was faking, because there's no telling what kind of crazy advice I actually gave him.
I remember number 36.  It was just last year.  It was the first birthday I spent away from family.  I was in the lovely country of Afghanistan.  My battle buddy and I got smoothies and watched Mean Girls in the office.
Of course, I remember my 37th.  Its today.  I came home from PT.  My wife and kids had decorated the house so nice with signs and streamers.  I was also greeted to a lot of hugs and a hot breakfast.
I'm sure my mom will read this and likely be offended that I don't remember all the cool birthdays she planned for me as a kid.  Its not that they weren't great.  They were all great!  Its just that they all have something in common which makes them not individually stand out.  Trust me, I will probably be saddened too when my kids grow up and don't remember the hours I poured into creating treasure hunts, making signs and videos, and putting together birthday epicness.
However, I'm glad that they are growing up being surrounded on their birthdays by good people that love them. 
That's what all my birthdays have had in common.  God has blessed me to be surrounded by people that love me and that I love.  I haven't had to spend one birthday alone.  I've never had to wonder if there was actually someone out there that cares about me.  Its always been evident. 
I know this isn't true for everyone, but this leads me to be more diligent about celebrating the lives of the people around me.  I will always try to make a big deal and make people feel special on their birthdays.  Even though the Facebook wishes don't take much effort and leave you with a billion notifications, it still feels nice to be reminded that there are people out there that care.
I believe God wants us to show others that we do care.  Its a big part of His design.  So as we think about ways that we show love to other people, may we look at ways to celebrate them, be their fans, and build them up. 
"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor"
Romans 12:10

Friday, September 11, 2015

My Opinion on Everything

Now, to share my opinion on everything that's been dominating our newsfeeds.....

Okay okay, I'm not that arrogant to think that the world is anxiously awaiting my humble thoughts like children lining up at the ice cream truck.  However, I feel a strong sense to share my heart after keeping silent for much of the summer.

Today is September 11.  Last year I spent the 11th in Afghanistan, a part of the conflict that spurred out of that tragic day 14 years ago.  Out of all the things that I remember about September 11, 2001, I at least have fond memories of the humility that day brought us, the unity that characterized our nation, and the spiritual awakening and turning back to God that occurred. 

Fast-forward 14 years and it seems that our nation is more divided than ever.

At some point, we moved on from the good that came from the pain and the lessons we learned.  We've moved back to a life of pride, selfishness, and out of the scope of God's wisdom.

I can't control anyone else.  As much as my pride might want to tell me that I can....i can't.  

As a Christ-follower, I do best by coming to grips with the fact that God is real and I am not Him.  He is in control.  That's why I need His wisdom.  

With this in mind, this is why I've been reluctant to share my thoughts on Same Sex Marriage, Ashley Madison, Kim Davis, Planned Parenthood, and Deflategate.  (Okay, that last one really doesn't matter that much...ha!)

I'm not reluctant because I fear criticism. I'm reluctant because I don't honestly believe that I'm always at a point where I can rationally share my opinion with a pure motive and heart.  Most of the time, I want to share it out of pride.  

Social media makes it too easy to lash out in pride.  It's easy to get your opinion out there and get into a competition of comebacks, clever memes, sharing articles that support, and trying to get the last word.  It all reeks of pride.  And I would normally be right in the midst of it, but I realized that I'd be acting in pride and ultimately, my arguing on social media is about as fruitful as trying to grow corn in a tub of charcoal.

That's why I need to focus on better things.  I need to focus on what I can control and that is asking God to help me walk in step with His Spirit and respond in Christ-like love to the world I live in never compromising the wonderful message of the Gospel.

When we have a moment of humility, we often leave it to indulge in a world in which we pridefully defend our way of life like it is ours to begin with.  

This may not be a popular view, but I think Kim Davis responded with pride.  In my humble opinion, I had to wonder why she didn't resign the moment she knew she'd have to do something that she convictionally could not do.  Waiting, defying authority, and going to prison communicated pride to me...not love.  

As burdened as I am for marriages, the Ashley Madison scandal wasn't surprising.  The bible communicates how rampant sin is in the flesh.  We have an enemy that is waiting to devour us.  My response is not to point fingers and act shocked at those individuals caught up in the scandal.  My response is to look at my own life and the sin that I allow to fester.  My little white lies make me guilty before a holy God the exact same as if I were to cheat on my wife.  Jesus says the heart is what matters, so it's not just the's the motives.  My lusting after another woman is the same as having an affair.  Having a short fantasy about a beautiful I encounter at the store is the same as paying Ashley Madison to have an affair.

Its easy for us to be critical of those who are unfaithful or of those in the midst of the same-sex lifestyle.  However, I wonder how many churches employ ministers and elect deacons that have been divorced and re-married, or that regularly look at pornography, or that have lustful thoughts about other people?  I find that we're okay with sin as long as we can't see it.  God's not.  How differently would things be if we looked at inner self with the same passion we look at other's sin?

No, I don't think Kim Davis should have gone to jail.  To send her to prison was a ridiculous abuse of judicial power.  No, I don't think that shop owners should be punished for denying business to same sex couples.  However, I think my response is better not to fall on the side of pridefully blasting my peers on social media.

The race issues are a shame.  This is proof that we have an enemy who has been hard at work to divide us since 9-11.  14 years ago, we praised police officers.  Today, they have to watch their backs because of prideful ignorance.  The fact that anyone willfully believes agenda-fueled media outlets is proof that we're not as smart as we think we are, or that we're comfortable operating in pride so much so that we like to only surround ourselves with people that agree with us.
Blaming guns.  Blaming police officers.  Its all agendas.  This is not reasonable thinking.  Reasonable thinking looks at self and asks the questions, "what do I need to change about me?".

A lot of people are scared to ask that question because as human beings, we fear change.  Remember, God wants to radical change us.

The Planned Parenthood issue has been the most troublesome to stay quiet on.  One, I think many fellow Christians have responded in ignorance and hate.  However, its also been hard because I am so passionate on this issue.  I believe abortion is the single most important issue in modern politics.  To me, what a politician believes about life tells me how much he aligns with my God who created life.  Obviously, I think Planned Parenthood is careless, hypocritical, and devalues life.  However again, I have to look at myself.  What am I doing to show value for life?  What am I teaching my children?  How am I taking care of my life and body?  Again, I believe the focus has to start on seeking God's wisdom and direction for what I do as His child.

Yes, there is a theme here.  It should be no surprise that sin resides in our world.  It should be no surprise that we have an enemy who is set on destroying.  We can only focus on examining our own hearts and asking God to help rid us of the things that don't belong there.  We can be bold.  We can communicate truth.  However, let the boldness start with examining self in a path to God-like holiness.  It takes boldness to give up the things the rest of the world holds dear in order to be more like God.

Take college football for example.  I see more passion out of my Christian brothers and sisters about college football than anything else.  In fact, I noticed quickly that when college football kicked off last Saturday, that the political and moralistic social media posts disappeared and the "Roll Tide Roll" statuses and stadium selfies took their place.  When it comes to college football, people stake their entire emotional state of mind on whether or not their team is winning or losing.  It becomes our life.  And if you ask most fans, they can tell you exactly what changes should take place to set their team on path towards a championship.

What changes should take place to set your life on path toward God's holiness?

My opinion on everything?  It's what change needs to happen in my life to make me more like God.  Jesus is the answer.  Thankfully, salvation isn't up to our works.  God's grace is good.  However, as long as I navigate this earth, my goal is to be more like my maker.  That's where He wants my mind, not on policing the world's sin problem.

As for other people.  My focus is to be on putting their needs above my own.  My focus is to disciple those that God saves.  I invest myself and pour into them the love and teaching of Christ.  I can't do that if I am not reflecting that myself.


2 things....

1. Check out  Interesting findings.  26 NFL teams were fined more than the Patriots for cheating last year.  That's almost every team.  So the Patriots are actually one of the least cheating teams in the league.  The media goes after them because they're so polarizing.

2.  Did you watch the "deflategate" game?  LeGarrette Blount ran for 148 yards and scored 3 touchdowns.  Andrew Luck threw 2 picks and no touchdowns.  Brady could have played with frisbees and it wouldn't have mattered.

Again, look at your own team.  How much do they cheat?

Notice a theme?

Today is September 11th.  Remember those who sacrificially gave their lives.  Honor them by living in unity and seeking God.  It starts with you and God.

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Congratulations, You're Banned for Life!

You're out like a fat kid in dodgeball!  When I was a kid, we actually played games in which you could be eliminated.  I hear it doesn't happen that way anymore.  Me personally, I believe getting out or eliminated builds character.  Its good for you.  You can't always win!
If you're like me, you've been eliminated in a game of dodgeball.  You've struck out in baseball or softball.  You've been frozen in a game of tag.  You've accidentally crossed the line in bowling and set the little buzzer off. 
Most of us know what it feels like to be disqualified!  Its not a great feeling.  But when it comes to a game, its not the end of the world either.
In life, we often feel disqualified.  Our view of God can sometimes get skewed in a way in which we believe that one mistake will get us "banned for life".  Now, without Christ, this is actually true.  We can't enter the Kingdom or have relationship with a Holy God apart from Christ.  One mistake builds a canyon between us.
In the wake of recent moral failures....(take your pick from the headlines), I believe its important to realize that in Christ we still go on.  We don't go on sinning, but we go on with the mission.  An unbelieving world frequently sees itself as unworthy and disqualified to come to God.  One of the ways the enemy deceives new believers is by telling them that they have too much baggage to be effective for God's work.  And yes, we as Christians will disqualify ourselves too.  We allow a moral brain fart or slide keep us from getting back into the game.
Thankfully the Gospel points to us not being banned for life.  When Peter royally screwed up, he left the game for a while.  He thought he was out.  He thought he'd been hit with the dodgeball.  He thought it was time to sit out and let the game go on without him.  However, even after Peter denied Jesus, went back to his life of fishing, Jesus still sought him out and told him to get back on mission.  Jesus wasn't surprised.  He knew Peter was going to mess up.  He predicted it!  He told Peter it would happen.  But Jesus also knew that Peter was "the rock".  Peter wasn't banned for life or disqualified.  Peter would be the one who preached the gospel to thousands during the moments of Pentecost and see thousands be saved.  It wasn't over!
The great thing about dodgeball is that we generally get another chance.  You might get hit and sit out for a moment, but usually another game starts up.  In fact, if your teammate catches the ball, you automatically get back in the game.  In freeze tag, if someone touches you, you're unfrozen and back in the game.  Its not contingent upon what we do.  Its all about the performance of someone else.  Through Jesus' performance, we have grace.  Yes, we will mess up, but he covers us with grace, makes us right before a Holy God, and has sent us His Spirit of power.  With that, God chooses to use us and impact the world for His purposes.  We can't use the excuse that we are all out of chances or that we've messed up too bad.  There's still work to do.  Its time to get back on the horse and try again! 
In no way does this give us a license to indulge in moral failures or tolerate them.  If anything, when I'm given a second chance, I'm grateful and I want to move on from my mistake.  I don't step back into the batter's box after a strikeout to strikeout again.  I step back in to knock the cover off the ball.
Are you struggling?  Have you failed?
Welcome to the club.  Jesus is ready for you to get your head back into the game.  Lean on Him and do great things!

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

What Marriage Has Taught Me in 15 Years

Today I've been married to my wife Stephanie for 15 years.  This isn't something for which I deserve a pat on the back.  The accolades belong to God.  It seems that when couples are married for more than 10 years, people start to congratulate them with a sort of admiration for their incredible accomplishment.  It appears to be an accomplishment because there are so many who struggle to make a marriage work.
I haven't found a secret to complete and total marital ectasy.  I'm not claiming that I've always done things right.  What I will share is that God really does give us a perfect strategy for our marriage relationships.  Not only that, God has desire to use our marriage relationships.  And if we think that the end to the means is to make us happy and comfortable....we're naive.
What I've learned in 15 years of marriage is this.....
Women really are crazy.
Men are crazy too.  We just hide it more.
As much as we would like our wives to laugh at farts the same way we do, it never seems to grow on them.
My wife and the GPS often argue.  Now I have 2 women that backseat drive.
My wife is not amused that I can flick my underwear in the air with my feet and catch it with my hands.
Seeing your child born is a beautiful thing.  Staring at the placenta is not.
My wife can amazingly operate on 1 minute of sleep.  I can't operate on anything less than six hours.
Offering to do the dishes 4 times a year doesn't impress my wife.
Apparently only downloading 1 app on your phone is a perfectly justifiable reason for my wife to have an iPhone.
I can no longer open my mouth while I sleep, because if I do, I'll pull out at least six long, blonde hairs at some point in the middle of the night.
Women think being on time is a sickness.
The Bachelorette is the most disgustingly addicting show ever.
Pizza is not okay more than 2 times a week.
There is no other woman that could put up with me.
I married up.
I'm blessed.
My wife is freaking awesome.
In all seriousness, I've learned that God gave us such a great blueprint in Ephesians 5:21-33.  In this passage, wives are called to submit.  This doesn't mean to become enslaved to their husbands.  This doesn't give the husband the right to become an evil dictator.  This means that wives trust in their husbands to take care of them.  In turn, husbands are called to sacrifice and take care of their wives.  This picture communicates the gospel.  We trust in Christ to take care of our salvation which He sacrificially provided on the cross. 
In both roles, the call is to consider the other more important than oneself.  In this practice, husband and wife actively work to meet each other's needs.  I've learned that if you work towards meeting your spouses' needs, it makes every other area of marriage so much easier and pleasant.  Of course, I can only truly do this through God's help and wisdom.  Its amazing how God gives us strategy in the bible, and when we actually think about, it makes perfect sense!
I could not have made it 15 years without God's providence, help, and direction.  He has blessed me with a wonderful, Godly, woman.  I am blessed.  It's also her birthday today!  I'm getting older....she's getting foxier.  I pray that all who read this would experience the same fulfillment in their marriages.  Yes, marriage takes work.  It takes sacrifice.  Its not always easy.  Apply what you learn, and learn from your mistakes.  Most importantly, use God's strategy.  You'll find that He knows what He's doing.
Dare to be different.  Our culture confuses and dumps on marriage.  Its been watered down and not taken seriously.  Commit to having a marriage that shares the gospel!

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

I Am Paralyzed

I would never make light of someone who is physically paralyzed.  In many cases, it is tragic.  The obstacles to overcome are tremendous.  I know Soldiers, men and women, who have been hurt, injured, and beat up from their time in military service.  Some are paralyzed.  Some have lost limbs.  Some are hurting.  Some are paralyzed by their own minds.
I am highly encouraged by those who have been dealt a tough hand and don't ask the world for a handout.  Instead of wallowing in self pity, they overcome.  Men and women who've lost limbs and particpate in triathlons, people who are confined to a wheelchair but are constantly active outdoors, and those who have been deeply wounded emotionally yet use their experiences to help others....all of these people are inspiring!  Whatever it is that has motivated them to defy the odds, it's evident that human weakness doesn't have to completely stop anyone from living a life of passion and fulfillment.
For most of us, fear is what paralyzes us.  We're held back by our own anxiousness, worry, doubt, and logic.  Fear can render us catatonic!  It can keep a dad from making up for lost time with his wife and kids.  It can stop a talented young lady from reaching her full potential.  It can keep an educated and mature man from advancing further in his career.  Spiritually speaking, it can keep us from reaching the heights God wants us to see.
God's call can be intimidating.  Some fear following God because of what they'll have to leave behind.  Some fear God because of all the wrong they've done.  Some fear God's call because it requires a change.  Some fear because God's call appears to go directly against human logic and understanding.  Some fear because of combinations of all of the above.
Whatever it is that drives fear to hold us back, we have to realize that is no way to live.  No matter what, I don't want to be held back by a human flaw or limitations.  In God, more than in anything else, the sky is not even the limit.  I can accomplish more than my mind can even conceive.  All it takes is laying aside fear and worry, and trusting in someone who provides the parachute, safety blanket, and cushion when we fall.  At the same time, He launches us into great heights and sets us off on a righteous explosive trail, doing things that we never would have imagined and bring Him the glory He deserves.
The first basic step is to acknowlegde your weakness, mistakes, fear, and ask God to forgive you and help you move forward from it.  After that, be ready to follow God into whatever path He is calling you to.  I love reading how the disciples dropped all they had to follow Jesus.  I love reading about Abraham's faithfulness, and how God used weak men like Moses and Jonah to do His work.
You've heard that it takes a child-like faith to follow God.  This doesn't mean that we're naive.  It just means we trust in God like we once trusted in our parents as little children.  We know and understand that God will take care of our needs and that He has a plan.  2 years ago today, I had the privilege of baptizing my daughter.  She was baptized because she has the faith that God is who He says He is, and she, with her child-like faith, decided to follow Him.  The leap of faith was no problem for her.  It is a huge problem for us.  We hold onto fear and cling comfortably to the edge.  Its time to let go.
Are you ready to take a leap of faith?  Is fear holding you back?  A life held back by fear is a miserable one.  No one should live that way.  Take the leap!  Leave fear at God's feet.

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Why I Deleted My Abortion Post

Abortion digusts me.  Politically, I feel its one of the primary issues.  If a leader doesn't value life the way God values life, then I don't want to vote them in to make decisions on everything concerning our livelihoods.
Earlier this week, in response to the blast of social media posts on the Planned Parenthood video, I decided to post out of frustration.  First of all, never post anything out of frustration on Facebook.  I said in my post something like this, "Not meaning to sound callous, but selling or throwing away isn't the issue.  Murdering the unborn is the biggest tragedy.  What are we really disgusted by?"
I posted this because it honestly bothered me that it took a hidden video disclosing that Planned Parenthood sold the aborted baby tissue to get people fired up about abortion again.  It bothered me because people seemed more fired up about Parenthood's Dr. Nucatola drinking wine and talky matter-of-factly about the company's tissue donation program.  A simple fact has not changed.....abortions are happening and have been happening this entire time!
I deleted the post because I didn't want to insinuate that all my fellow brother's and sister's posts were motivated by the wrong things.  I deleted it because I didn't want to communicate the wrong picture.  Abortion bothers me.  The fact that Planned Parenthood sells the tissue bothers me.  It bothers me to think of a baby being discarded in any fashion, whether it being thrown away or sold on a black market.
A road that I desperately want to avoid and want fellow Christ-followers to avoid is lashing out in hatred.  Honestly, I have to pray deeply that God would give me love and deep burden for those who choose to practice abortion and kill babies.   
I will always stand up boldly for life.  However, I've decided my primary response will be to respond in a way that celebrates the life that God gives.  I love being a parent.  Children are a beautiful gift of grace from God!  There are moments each day that remind me how awesome it is to be a parent.  There are moments that remind me how precious of a gift they are.  Instead of posting out of frustration about how others view life, I am going to post out of celebration of my own parenthood.  When you see a #parenthood post on my page, its a celebration of God's gift of life.  This is not me trying to be extra holy or better than everyone else who shares their opinions on the abortion issue.  You already know mine.  It disgusts me.  I believe it is wrong.  I believe it is murder.  I will do what I can to encourage others to see the way I believe God wants us to see.  And you better believe I'm going to do that by showing others how awesome life is!
God values life.  We should value life.

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Pride Comes Before a Fall

If you're looking for a Christian post slamming the Supreme Court decision on same-sex marriage, this isn't for you.  If you're looking for a Christian post to promptly troll on because of its bigotry, hate, or to hashtag "love wins", this isn't for you.  This isn't for you because I'm not here to talk about which side won, who is better, or how the world is going to end.
I stayed silent on this issue because frankly the response from people made me sick.  My Facebook newsfeed was a billboard for hateful posts, messages, comments, memes, and videos.  The hate was not one-sided.  The hate came from all angles and corners.  The better word to use is actually "pride"....not gay pride, but just plain old selfish human "pride".
To me, this issue has become much more than a moral and spiritual debate.  Its become a polarizing issue involving sides, winners, and losers.  Many Christians have become so infatuated with being right on the issue of marriage and homosexuality, that they've forgotten why they want to be right in the first place.  Its not about Jesus anymore.  Its about conforming everyone into the moralistic picture that's been created in their minds.  Its about it being "their ball" and now they're fed up, taking the ball, and going home.
Trust me, I believe the bible clearly defines homosexuality as sin, as it does many other forms of sexual immorality involving everything from heterosexual acts to beastiality.  I believe in the biblical definition of marriage.  However, what I don't believe in is pridefully choosing a side and positioning myself against someone because of the sin they choose.  If I practiced this, I'd be against everyone, including myself, because we're all sinful.
On the other side of the fence, you've got those who embrace same-sex marriage and celebrated the SCOTUS decision.  In an attempt to proudly displays the colors of the pride flag, the true colors of the "love wins" agenda was shown.  It wasn't about love winning.  It was about being on the right side.  Ironically, posts filled with #lovewins spewed hateful and prideful comments in the face of the opponents they supposedly beat.
Love did not win in this issue at all.  If anything, the SCOTUS decision exposed how divided we really are as a nation.  However, I'm not pessimist.  I still believe in God's healing power and love.  Yes, we can respond as Christians with the witted "yes, love did win...Jesus" posts or "heterosexual pride" posts, but is that really the answer?  This shouldn't be about getting the last word.  It should be about humbly submitting ourselves to Christ.
Regardless of where you stand on this issue, I must ask, have you humbly submitted yourself to Christ and the loving message and truth of the Gospel? 
Scripture gives us a proverbial warning that I believe is necessary to remember, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall." Proverbs 16:18
Pride leads to destruction.  The history of our world is filled with examples.  Great nations like the Roman empire could not even hold its reign in the face of an eventual collapse.  What happened before the collapse?  Pride. 
Pride is all about regard for yourself, your ideas, your opinions, and your way of life.  Its self-centered and focused.  Its competitive and about being the best and greatest.

Jesus said, "If anyone would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all." Mark 9:35.  He said this after a pride fueled argument broke out among His disciples over which of them was the greatest. 

Life is not about being right.  Its about being right with God.

Does that make sense?  We aren't called to be correct.  One, we're all sinners.  All of us are imperfect screw-ups.  We cannot do enough to be "right".  We will eventually be wrong!  That's why we need Jesus.

We are called to be right with God!  Many people don't believe this.  Even the people that do believe are divided and come to different conclusions on what that means.  That's the facts.  I do believe there is only one way to God....that's through Jesus Christ.  I do believe God has clear cut expectations for us.  That's evident in his word.  However, we must constantly seek His word humbly in order to understand what it means to live for Him and be right with Him.

At the point in which you are determining what is right by your own standards, in competition, or because it effects your comfort zone, then you are dangerously leaving God out of the picture. 

Seeing the pride in this issue is scary.  Its scary because we're headed toward a fall.  That's the bigger issue here. 

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